Ruby's past actions caused deep emotional scars. Her hurtful words and public shaming cannot be easily forgiven. The family's refusal to attend the baby shower reflects the pain she inflicted, and she should acknowledge the consequences of her actions instead of demanding forgiveness.
While Ruby's past behavior was undeniably harsh, the OP is now weaponizing the family's collective disapproval to punish her further. Refusing to attend the baby shower and influencing others to do the same is a vindictive act that exacerbates the family rift. The OP should consider extending an olive branch for the sake of future family harmony.
The court acknowledges Ruby's past transgressions, which were undeniably hurtful and unwarranted. However, the OP's current stance appears excessively punitive. While forgiveness cannot be forced, the OP's orchestration of a family boycott, especially during a vulnerable time for Ruby, is not conducive to reconciliation. Both parties bear responsibility for the ongoing animosity.